This is one of the areas where most men really struggle. And I mean really struggle. But here’s the good news: if you can even be decent at it, you’ll stand out from 90% of the other guys on dating apps. And the better you get, the more this will translate directly into going out on dates.
Think of it like playing chess. First, you need to understand the rules. Then you learn general strategies. But eventually, you have to play the game and think a few moves ahead. Practice and refinement are what make you great at it.
Important note: She didn’t match only with you, and you're probably not the only guy in her inbox. So, if you want your conversation to stand out, you’ll need to put in some effort. Luckily, there are some simple guidelines that will significantly increase your chances of kickstarting a meaningful and engaging chat.
Why it works:
Questions create immediate engagement and give the other person a chance to respond thoughtfully. The key is to make the question fun, playful, and related to something in her profile. You want to spark her interest and make her smile as she reads it.
If she has pictures from various places around the world:
You:
“Looks like I’m chatting with quite the adventurer! So, are you more of a backpacking type, or is a resort more your vibe?”
Her:
“Haha, definitely a resort type, not sure I’d survive a backpacking trip!”
You:
“That’s fair. I’m more into the resort life too But I’m curious… maybe I could convince you to rough it sometime You don’t seem like someone who minds getting a little dirty now and then, do you?”
Even if you're interested in knowing what someone does in a more generic sense, there’s a way to approach it with creativity, as follows:
You:
“Seems like I’m dealing with quite an adventurer here. Hope I’ll be able to keep up with the pace Are you the backpacking or resort type?”
Her:
“Lol, I’m definitely the resort type.”
You:
“Yeah, it sure seems like it Not a fan of the dirtier experiences?”